Hair Consultant Donna Ward's Approval Rating at 59%
June 20, 2002
MANITOU SPRINGS, CO -- Donna Ward, the present Hair
Consultant in Manitou Springs, has
the approval of 59% of the ColoardoGuy community according to the
most recent poll. Nearly six out of ten respondants approve of her
job performance as encourager, advocate and chief executive of Steve's long, naturally curly hair.
"Is that it? Gosh that's not a lot." replied Donna upon hearing
the news, "Then again, 59% is over half."
"For those who don't approve (of my job performance), they probably
didn't vote for me any way (in April)." said Donna.
Donna gave credit to herself for the diminished dred-lock problem
that hampered Steve last year and spoke very optimistically about how
long Steve's hair has grown this summer.
"Steve's hair (see adjacent
picture of his hair combed out) has reallly grown … it looks really healthy and it's
the longest it's ever been. I'm real proud of that." said Donna.
Most applaud Donna's work during this period where Steve has no
pressing hair-related problems
and his hair length is the longest ever. In fact, Donna has capitalized
on the extra time by focusing on other noble projects such as feeding Steve food,
getting on his case about acquiring a girlfriend,
and mentoring women via e-mail whom she met on the Friendship Board.
Ward's approval rating of 59% can been viewed positively or
negatively. When she won the election in April, Donna obtained
51% of the popular vote against two other candidates. Thus, 59% could
be viewed as an increase from her original support in April. However,
the fact that 4 in 10 people in the public arena disapprove of her job performance is
something to be taken seriously.
While Donna is content with her 59% approval rating,
Dawnn DiVito possessed the highest approval rating in
history (74%) in March 2001. As Dawnn would testify, such popularity
should not be taken for granted because just eight months later, she was fired after
her popularity plummeted (31% approved)
because of questions about her ability to lead.
"Your hair looks a lot better now than when Dawnn was
taking care of it." exclaimed Donna, alluding to her
from their contemptuous election in 2001.
Anonymous Critic Speaks Out
Not all are impressed with Donna's
job performance. One Manitou Springs local (who wished to remain anonymous)
voiced concern that Donna is a Do-Nothing Hair Consultant.
"When people voted (in the poll), what were people basing that on? I wanna hear from the
horses mouth. What has (Donna) done specificially for Steve's hair? Name me one thing!
I haven't seen any evidence of her doing a thing! Where's
the puddin', Donna?" exclaimed the anonymous individual.
"And her hair? ... It looks so plain."
With two months of service as Hair Consultant, Donna appears to have acclimated
to the barrage of compliments and criticisms that come her way.
"I like everybody even if they don't like
me." explained Donna, "Being Hair Consultant is a tough job, but
it's very rewarding and fun."
NOTE: As Hair Consultant, it is Donna Ward's responsibility to
help Steve grow his naturally, curly hair extremely long. She is also expected
to peform practical tasks such as offering advice
about split-end prevention, choosing hair care products and other hair-related
issues. Furthermore, the Hair Consultant is expected to be a public
figure and advocate for Steve's hair on this web site.
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